HUSBAND, DAD, GRANDPA

               

Young Don

The Introvert

A classic introvert, quiet (sometimes extremely quiet for my taste), voracious reader (Amazon.com must love him so!). Says, “split a Pepsi with you”; hoards chocolates in fear that another depression might come and the country will be out of chocolates. Analytical (this wife complains, “Oh, Don, must you always wonder how many angels can stand on the head of a pin?”), cautious (always wants to have his ducks in a row). “Great guns!” is the strongest exclamation you would hear from him; needs at times to get away to reenergize; very deliberate. Forgets names but remembers faces; loses things but never his way when driving. Loves deeply but never wears his deep affections on his sleeves. Never showy and hates to call attention to himself. Authentic.

Does not like IKEA because they make him put things together; avoids doing dishes like the plague; has a love-hate relationship with the telephone; thinks his wife is silly when she buys cut flowers rather than flowering potted plants. Loves music, and really good music, but music does not love him (music teacher’s statement “I think you may be tone-deaf.”); likes birds and birdwatching (was so pleased to find out that he shared this hobby with John Stott, the English theologian).

A Passionate Love for God

But these are not the qualities that I have found of great significance about Don, rather

Kristy & her dad

it has always been his quiet, passionate love for God. I have always known that God was his first and great love, and I would be a distant second. That was fine with me. (Besides, there is just no competing with God!) If that could be passed on to my children’s DNA, I would not have given them a better gift. I know though that this love for God was not passed on to my children through their genes, but through the model that Don has been to them. Shortly out of high school, Matthew had a confrontational exchange with me over issues. It was very painful for me to hear what he had to say. He told me how I lost him when he was in junior high, because I was so busy with things at work and my involvement in political things. Amid my tears, I heard him say, “I want to be like my dad. My dad does a lot of good things quietly, without letting people know.”

The Model

A pastor’s life is not the easiest. As we raised our children, we had our share of fears. We relied heavily on God’s assurance that He was with us. The pressure of raising a pastor’s children as normally and as close to the scriptural way, in a culture that more often than not, conflicts with God’s ways, weighed heavily on us. Don’s being pastor of a small, interracial church also had its unique demands. But God as always, was faithful. Our lives have been the richer for everything He has allowed us to experience.

If imitation is the highest form of flattery (I rather want to say “compliment”), I think our daughter has flattered us.   She, too, chose a pastor’s life when she married a man who has the same passionate love for God as her dad. She and her husband have been pastors to young people for about ten years of their 14 years of married life.

                                                         Grandpa Don & Haley
Have a very special
Father's Day, Don, and to all the fathers out there!